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Greg Sanders: Sex God

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(no subject) [May. 9th, 2007|12:21 am]
Who: Nick
Where: Their house
When: Immediately after Rachel's birthday party.

Greg shuts the door behind the last guest with a sigh. The party went off without a hitch, surprisingly and thankfully enough. Rachel is completely worn out and he's thankful for that too because he could tell that by the end of the party, Nick was about to lose it. They have a lot to talk about and it's better if Rachel sleeps through it. It's actually kind of a miracle that Rachel's any sort of awake considering Calvin bailed on the party long ago.

Greg puts Rachel to bed with a soft kiss and she's out within seconds, sleeping peacefully. He smiles down at her and prays everything works out okay. After a moment of just watching her, he goes back out to the living room and gathers up the garbage before making his way into the kitchen where Nick is putting dishes in the dishwasher.

"Looks like all that's left to do is take down the decorations," he says softly, not knowing what else to say.
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(no subject) [Feb. 9th, 2007|07:39 pm]
[mood | anxious]

Who: Nick (also facing Calvin)
Where: The hospital and then Nick and Greg's house.
When: A couple of days after the dinner with Aiden

Despite what Aiden thinks, Greg has arranged for Calvin to come stay with him and Nick. If a judge is going to think he influenced him by talking to him initially, the damage is already done and this can't make things any worse. Besides, Calvin's helped him a lot, just by being who he is, and Greg wants to return the favour as best he can.

Greg walks through the hospital, barely needing to watch where he's going. Afterall, he's practically lived in this place since moving to Miami. It's a little sad, but he doesn't really think about it anymore.

Knocking lightly on Calvin's door, he pops his head in. "Hey, you ready to get out of here?"
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(no subject) [Feb. 2nd, 2007|06:48 pm]
Who: Nick and Aiden
Where: Nick and Greg's place.
When: Current.


After a month, Greg was relieved to finally find that he, Nick and Aiden all managed to have an evening off together. He's been anticipating this dinner ever since Aiden and Nick agreed to it. He's anxious to prove to Nick that Aiden's really a good person and that she just made a mistake when they were young. He also wants Aiden to see that Nick's just trying to protect him (as per usual). He just knows that if they can get over the past that they could be great friends.

Needless to say, this is a big night for Greg and he's more than a little nervous.

He's been cleaning all day, wanting everything to be perfect. Nick's been in the kitchen all day making lasagne from scratch, which Greg has to admit still impresses him. Come on, who makes lasagne from scratch? It's mouthwateringly good though, so Greg would never even think of saything that to Nick.

Picking up Rachel out of her playpen, he walks into the kitchen. "How's it coming in here?" he asks, smiling, though obviously a bit nervous. He just wants them to get along so badly...
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Coming Home [Dec. 5th, 2006|10:54 pm]
[music |Coming Home- City and Colour]

Who: Nick
Where: The hospital to start.
When: Backdated to a suitable amount of time before the Christmas party. (Time really flies eh?)

It's finally happened, the doctors have finally decided that Greg can go home. He had been starting to wonder as he didn't think his injuries were bad enough to keep him this long, but he was assured over and over that it was proceedure.

Now he's nervous because he doesn't really know where he stands with Nick. He's always happy to see him when he comes to visit, and misses him when he's gone, but with everything that's happened, he doesn't really know if he should trust these feelings. He's worried that he's going to hurt Nick again, and he just can't deal with that. Not right now, not ever.

So he just sits there, waiting for Nick to come take him home and hopes for the best. What else can he do?
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(no subject) [Oct. 18th, 2006|06:57 am]
Who: No one, stand alone
Where: Club Rouge
When: A few days after Hallowe'en

The turning point )
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(no subject) [Oct. 2nd, 2006|11:13 pm]
[Current Location |Home]
[mood | sad]
[music |Sigor-Ros]

Who: Jude
When: Current
Where: Phonecall to start

Greg's gone through many emotional states since Nick walked out their... scratch that, his front door. Right now he's lodged fully in trying to understand what went wrong, what he's done wrong, starting with his interest in the S&M world. He knows that it's one of the underlying reasons for Nick leaving. He knows that Nick hates it about him and that it's one of the reasons he can't resist Tim.

He's also heard that Maria's back in town and figures she, or one of her employees, could at least give him some advice on what to do.

With a sigh, he puts Rachel down for her nap and picks up the phone, dialing the number for the House of Whacks.
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(no subject) [Sep. 25th, 2006|03:34 pm]
Who: Nick via email
Where: Greg's at home
When: current

Greg's drunk, again. He's been drinking more and more since Nick left and all he can think is that at least he's not on drugs again. He knows he probably shouldn't be drunk with Rachel around, but she's asleep and has taken to sleeping the whole night through, or so he justifies it to himself.

He's bored and his fifth glass of whiskey on the rocks isn't helping like it should. He feels empty and alone. He misses Nick more than he's ever missed anyone and he doesn't know how to get over it. Before he knows it, he finds himself sitting at the computer and starting an email to him. He hadn't even intended on emailing Nick, but now that he's here, he might as well. It's not like it could hurt anything at this point.

To: nstokes@miami-dade.org
From: gsanders@miami-dade.org

I dn't evn know why I'm writing thiss. I know I've messed everythhning up and I'e loest oyu forever, but I miss you and I just sat down and started wrigitn. I'm so sorry for everything Nciky. I'm sorry I hurt you, I know you don't believe it but I never meant to hrut you. I just never believed that I deserved someoen as good as you. I didn't mean it when I siad I don't know waht love is because I love you. I'm sorry, I know it's over, that I fucked up beyond you ever wanting me again,b ut I thought you should know.

I hope you're doing better at home. I know how much you've missed your parents. I'm sure they're so happy to see you and I bet they were happy to see you and all that. I don't even know what I'm asying anymore. I just want you to be happy. That's all I vever wanted for you.

I'm sor sorry,
Greg.


He hits send, tears streaming down his face, and heads to the couch where he passes out into a thankfully dreamless sleep.
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(no subject) [Sep. 3rd, 2006|02:10 am]
[mood |dead inside]

Who: Dr. Marta Hendersen
When: Immediately after Nick finds out about Greg and Tim
Where: Phonecall to start.


Greg feels numb, totally and completely numb. He's never fucked up so badly in his whole life. He's never managed to hurt someone so badly before, especially not someone he cares so damned much about. He's nauseous and shaking and he has no idea what to do.

Finally, after wandering aimlessly around the all too quiet house for god knows how long, he picks up the phone and dials Dr. Hendersen. He hadn't been to see her in awhile as he'd been doing so well. Looks like it had all been an illusion, one that had even fooled Greg himselff.

He taps his foot impatiently, waiting for someone to answer the damned phone.
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Continued from the thread in the weapons room on the main page. [Aug. 27th, 2006|02:01 am]
Who: Timmy and Greggo
Where: The weapons room
What: An immediate continuation from here


Greg laughs, but it sounds a bit nervous. There's still an air in the room of sexual tension and he's not really sure what's going to happen or what to do. "Yeah, isn't cleaning it a necessity?" he asks, trying to sound casual.

He gives Tim an odd look. "Last I heard he was called out to a scene. Something about a three car pile up on the interstate," he says, sounding curious. "Why?"
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(no subject) [May. 21st, 2006|11:53 am]
[mood |nervous]

Who: Greg's shrink, session number 2
Where: Her office
When: current, about a week after the last session.

Greg's nervously sitting in his car outside of Dr. Hendersen's office, clutching a piece of paper with his feelings on it. Writing them down and just generally thinking about them was really hard to do. He just hopes it's good enough for her. He reads the list again, for the millionth time.

I feel happy whenever I see Nick, no matter what.
I feel happy and loved whenever I see my daughter.
I feel uncomfotable when Nick tries to read me or read into what I'm saying.
I feel scared when I have to talk about anything personal.
I feel sad and upset when I disappoint someone I love.
I feel upset when I make someone talk about something they don't want to talk about
I feel happy when I get attention.
I feel relieved that people still love me after everything I've done.
I feel embarrassed at other people's perceptions of me, whether they are good or bad doesn't matter.

He had wanted to add in how good he'd felt when Nick told him that he and Josh had fought because of him, but he didn't know how to express it, so he just left it out, figuring he could bring it up if he really wanted to, which he kinda does. He reads over the paper one more time, noticing that it has the feel of a kid writing lines as punishment, but he couldn't think of a better way to write it down. Not that it matters, it's too late to change it now.

He finally gets out of his car, albeit a bit slowly, and heads into the office. The secretaray nods to him and says he's free to go right in. He notes her slight smile again and wonders if she's just being polite. Nick's always telling him that all these girls are attracted to him and ever since that woman at the hospital last year with all the aura talk, he keeps wondering if a girl is flirting or just being polite every time they're nice.

Without another thought about girls, he knocks on Dr. Hendersen's door, waiting for her response. He knows he can probably just go right in, but that always seemed rude to him and it would make him uncomfortable.
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(no subject) [May. 7th, 2006|04:19 pm]
[mood | depressed]

Who: Aiden
Where: Starting with a phonecall, end of shift.
When: The day after Greg goes to interview Hiram, Ray visits Nick and Nick confronts Greg about the cheating. Before Greg starts going to the shrink.

Greg doesn't even know why he bothered to come into work today. He does his best to stay on track, but considering the case he's working, it's kind of hard not to get distracted. Thankfully there wasn't much going on with the case today. Just a revisit to the scene and some research on the other similar cases that Frank had come across. The detective had been right, there was something very similar about those cases, they just needed to find something concrete.

He's sitting in the breakroom, feeling incredibly relieved that the shift is over, but still feeling generally shitty. What he needs is to get this out, to someone impartial that he trusts. He's already set up an appointment with a shrink, but that's not for a couple of days and he wants to talk now. Normally he'd talk to Nick, but he just can't do that with this, for obvious reasons. Once upon a time he would've even tried going to Tim, but not only does he know that that's a stupid mistake that he'll never make again, he also hasn't seen him since he took off to New York. He's heard rumour that he's back in town, but he's trying resolutely not to care. The only other person that comes to mind is Aiden. He owes her an explanation for yesterday too.

He pulls out his cell and dials her number. Listening to to it ring, he hopes she's free.
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(no subject) [May. 4th, 2006|07:07 am]
[mood | nervous]

Who: Greg's new shrink
Where: The shrink's office
When: Current.

Greg's nervous, really nervous. He's aware that he never should've stopped going to a psychiatrist, or rather, he should've seen the signs indicating that he needed to go back to one when he got here. He'd seen one in Vegas, after the explosion, but all they'd dealt with is the explosion and considering the problems he's had since arriving in Miami well over a year ago, it should've been plainly obvious that he was nowhere near ready to not be seeing someone.

He can't help but think that he stopped going because it wasn't getting him anywhere, which seems realistic, but he doesn't know whether or not that's true, or it's just the excuse he's built up in his head because he absolutely hates the idea of delving any deeper into his inner thoughts than he already has. Talking about the explosion had been easier than dealing with the things he really needed to deal with and he realizes now that he'd just been going through the motions so he could go back to work.

Greg reaches the door of the doctor's office and hesitates only slightly before walking into the reception area. He decided not to go with the lab recommended shrink this time and chose his own. The lab doctors seem different to him and he wants to get away from that. There's twenty-something, fairly pretty probably hot, if you were straight girl sitting behind a desk. She informs him that he can go in when he's ready and goes back to her filing after giving him a soft smile.

He gives her a tight, nervous nod and heads back to the next room, figuring the sooner he gets in there, the sooner he gets this over with. After a brief knock, he walks into the room, holding his breath without even realizing it.
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(no subject) [Mar. 20th, 2006|01:59 am]
[mood | depressed]

Who: Nick
Where: Nick's place
When: The day Greg finds out he failed his proficiency, a few days before St. Patty's day.

Failing his proficiency was the proverbial straw that broke Greg's back. He doesn't even remember how he got it, as he sits there on Nick's living room floor, needle in his arm and all his cares flying out the window. He just knows that it must have been easy to get, either that or he remembers how to get drugs with no connections way to well. It takes only seconds for Greg to be back in that special place that only junkies know about, a place he's missed entirely too much, a place he now realizes he just can't do without. The world sucks and he doesn't want to fight anymore.

Nick still isn't due home for awhile, which at first was the reason why Greg did it now. He figured that he'd get high and have enough time to mellow out a bit before Nick got home so he could actually deal with telling him what a failure he really is... that is if Nick doesn't already know. Greg's heroin highs are strange, he starts off mellow, euphoric, and then gets a strange burst of energy before mellowing out again. He manages to clean the whole apartment from top to bottom during his energy spurt. He's just mellowing out again and sitting on the floor, considering another 'last' hit when he hears Nick's key in the door. He can't quite look up from the little balloon as he hears the door open.
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(no subject) [Jan. 19th, 2006|05:07 am]
Who: Sara
When: Christmas Day (yes, I know, we're behind)
What: phone call to start.

Greg gets out of the shower at Nick's place and dries himself off slowly. He's a little nervous about calling Sara because he's not really sure when the last time he saw her was, and he feels that he's letting her down. He hasn't been nearly enough support for her lately. Then again, he hasn't really been any help to anyone in a long time. He just hopes he can get his head together before his daughter is born.

He grabs his cell phone as he leaves the bathroom, stomach growling again as he smells the turkey. He wonders if Nick knows how to make gravy, he loves gravy. He flips open his phone and dials Sara, hoping she's not going to kill him because he either saw her while wasted and totally pissed her off, or suddenly dropped off the planet for a few days. Either way, she can't be too happy with him.

He shifts nervously from foot to foot as he listens to the phone ring on the other end.
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(no subject) [Jan. 10th, 2006|01:53 am]
[mood | depressed]
[music |the ringing of a phone]

Who: Ray
Where: Phone call to start. After that, who knows?
When: After the fight with Nick and after getting picked up at the bar by Timmy, definitely after all the stripper stuff, but before Christmas. Phew! I think that's it.

Greg folded and unfolded the piece of paper he had in his pocket over and over again. On the piece of paper was a phone number, a phone number he had stolen from Speed, a phone number that could easily be the best and worst thing for him. Greg's at his wits end, he must be if he's considering calling Ray Caine about drugs. He just doesn't know what to do anymore, and the thought of sleeping is almost worst than the dreams he has.

He unfolds the paper one more time and sighs before pulling out his cell and dialing. He's starting to feel just this side of sober and that's just not good. He listens to it ring and wonders what the hell is wrong with him.
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(no subject) [Dec. 28th, 2005|02:59 pm]
[mood | drunk]

Who: Timmy
Where: Some random bar
When: A couple of hours after Greg's fight with Nick. (Before Christmas)

After leaving Nick's, for what Greg feared to be the last time, it didn't take him long to get completely smashed at the first bar he found. The bar tender had just stopped serving him and he sat swaying on his barstool, trying to figure out where to go and how to get there. He may not be feeling much like living at this point, but he's not about to drink and drive. Taking other, innocent people out with you just isn't cool.

Greg wrestles his cell phone out of his pocket, fully intent on calling Sara. She'll probably be pissed at him, but he doesn't really care right now. Little does he know that he's hit the wrong speed dial number and he isn't calling who he thinks he is... Humming a song that might sound like 'Love Song' by the Cure if he wasn't completely off his face, he waits for someone to answer the phone.
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(no subject) [Dec. 22nd, 2005|03:05 am]
[mood | depressed]
[music |Love Song- The Cure]

Who: Nick
Where: The beach, though it starts with a drunken phone call
When: Christmas Eve.

It's really a good thing that the stripper case is over for the most part, because Greg is in no condition to work. Thankfully, he had a lot of overtime and managed to get time off for the holidays because he's been drunk ever since he left Nick's after their huge blowout. The last couple of days that's been heightened by the speed he finally managed to score. It's been a rollercoaster ride of emotions ever since then and he honestly doesn't really remember much of it. Which is why it's not surprising that he suddenly realizes that he's on the beach and he has no idea how he got there. He finds this realization momentarily scary, but then he's over taken by the feelings caused by lots of booze and speed again. He can't think why people say it's bad to take uppers and downers at the same time because he feels great.

Except that he's crying and shaking and he's not really sure what's going on anymore.

And it's happening again. He's done something without even realizing that he's done it. All he knows is that suddenly he's got his cell phone to his ear and it's ringing, but for the life of him he's not sure who he called, though he does have his suspicions. The only reason he really noticed is because the sound of 'Love Song' by the Cure suddenly turned into a loud ringing. He looks down and sees his earphones lying in the sand, the end of the song still playing through them.

He almost jumps when he hears someone pick up on the other end of the line.
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(no subject) [Dec. 21st, 2005|01:46 am]
[mood | anxious]

Who: Nick
When: Right after leaving his session at the House of Whacks
Where: Nick's place.

Greg knows that he has to tell Nick what he just did and he wants to do it A.S.A.P. Putting it off would only make things worse, that is, if Nick does really hate what he's done. He hopes that he doesn't, that he'll understand that this is just something that he needed to do, but he has a very bad feeling that Nick just might not understand. It's quite the internal debate for him. On one hand a session at the House is a stress reliever of the magnatude that Greg's never felt before, on the other hand he really doesn't want to upset Nick, not for anything, and he knows that Nick doesn't really understand this part of him.

Nervously, he parks at Nick's place and heads up to his apartment. Using his key, he unlocks the door. He doesn't know if Nick's even home from work yet. If he isn't, he'll just hang out and wait for him.
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(no subject) [Dec. 14th, 2005|01:51 am]
Who: Nick
Where: Nick's place
When: Right after the incident with Timmy in the alleyway.


Greg waited, slumped against the wall in the alley for a good half an hour after Tim left, wanting to make sure he was really and truly gone. Well, that and he needed to compose himself. "God, I can't believe how fucking stupid I am," he mumbles to himself. He just can't believe that after everything he knows about Tim, that he thought that they could be friends. More than anything, this thought sadens him. He actually likes hanging out with Tim, but he knows now that that will never be possible, not if Tim is constantly going to try to jump him. He has no idea what made Tim change like that, so suddenly. One second they're walking along, having a nice normal conversation and the next thing he knows Tim's pinning him up against a wall. Greg's upset, confused and hurt and there's only one place he can think of to go, to make him feel better.

He looks down at his watch. It's a little too early for Nick to be home from work, but Greg feels like walking and he figures that by the time he walks there, he'll have a better chance of catching him, especially if he takes a senic route, which he does. After a nice long walk, he finally makes it to Nick's place, still feeling upset, confused and hurt, but still feeling a bit better as he realizes that Tim always evokes those feelings in him. He figures the fresh air must have helped too.

Walking slowly up to Nick's apartment, he knocks, hoping that he's allowed enough time and that Nick's home.
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(no subject) [Dec. 8th, 2005|05:48 am]
[mood | exhausted]

Who: Maria
How: Phonecall
When: After Sara finds out about his nightmares.


Greg can't take it anymore. He's under too much stress and he knows that that's what's causing his nightmares, causing him to not sleep and he can't do it anymore. The last time this happened, it didn't bother him as much because he was really only hurting himself. Now his problem seems to be hurting everyone around him. Everytime he sees Nick looking thoroughly zombie-like at work after he's spent the night, everytime he wakes up Sara and startles their unborn baby because he's so loud, he knows it's because of him, because he can't let go of all the tension in his life.

The last time he'd desperately needed to lose some tension his life had changed dramatically and he's not willing to let it go that far again.

Still, Greg learned something from his time with Tim and that was that even though the sex was really good, it wasn't really about the sex for him, it was how Tim could force him to let go. That's what he needs right now, to let go. There's no way he's going to Tim though, Tim isn't what he needs anymore and there's no way he'd risk what he has with Nick.

Greg sits on his bed contemplating all this, on one of his rare times at home. He had just stopped in to change his clothes before going back to work when he had been over come with exhaustion and realized that he can't keep this up. One thought occurs to him, during his contemplation and it seems like the obvious solution. A way for him to release tension, the way he knows how, without it being sexual.

He picks up his cell phone and scrolls through his saved numbers, searching for a number he hasn't called in a long time. He finds it after a bit and dials it immediately. He knows that Maria probably isn't doing sessions, but she's at least got to have an idea about what he can do, or recommend someone else.

He listens to the phone ring, and waits for her answer.
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